i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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