dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
