And the cops told us we were all naked.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
