so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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