We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
