great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
well most of my day revolves around power hour
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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