I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Randomize
