It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize
