Non-Jews are for practice
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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