Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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