A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
