i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize