I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
