Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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