We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
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