my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize