found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
you had me at cake vodka
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
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