I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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