"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
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