I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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