Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
