the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
