You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
