she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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