Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i will never coherently bang her
drinking out of a sandbucket again
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Randomize
