Midget sex pt 2 tonight
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
