Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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