Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
