spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
