Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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