If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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