did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
