yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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