I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
