I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize