My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
She told me I should be a condom model.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize
