I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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