So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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