News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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