: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Randomize
