Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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