I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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