dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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