look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
