I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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