i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
