did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Drake has all the answers
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
