Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
