I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize