And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
