it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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