I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Randomize
