doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Randomize
